Continuation of the tale

If you are just joining, please read part 1 of this horrifying tale from yesterday.

Picking up where we left off, I arrived at the evil empire ready to face my fears. (examiners)

For those that don’t know, the exam takes place at a hotel where you move from hotel room to hotel room of 8 examiners. Yes, these are the actual rooms they sleep in. You have 25 minutes to convince each person that you aren’t a complete moron, and at the end of 25 minutes, a woman walks down the hallway with a xylophone telling you time is up. Yes, this is all true. So weird. So archaic. But it’s history and kinda fun to be part of such a strange tradition.

You go to a room full of nervous looking people in dark suits. They give you an orientation to the exam and then your list of examiners.

I cannot tell you how happy I was to not see some certain names on my list. Those people are legendary and I didn’t want to become part of the lore.

Standing in front of my first room, I felt surprisingly calm, mostly amused at how crazy and surreal it was. It was nice to see so many familiar faces in the hall with me. Many of the same faces I have seen since interviewing for residency. We all gave each other a silent nod of understanding and encouragement and the first bell rang.

My first examiner asked me how it felt to be in Louisville. I said “Oh this is absolutely delightful.” We both laughed.

Then the laughter stopped.

The 8 sections go quickly. It is really amazing.

And in the blink of an eye, the last section was over and my last examiner said ,”I thank you for coming in today.” I did not know how to respond. I mean, as if I had a choice. I think I mumbled, No, thank you!”

I took the elevator down, and sat in a chair in the lobby for 5 minutes alone in silence staring into space in a daze.

I then returned to my hotel room, changed, and made my way to the airport.

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Win or lose, I knew I had to celebrate that process being over.

And so we made our way to the airport Chili’s and made it rain. 20130612-222635.jpg20130612-222643.jpg20130612-222651.jpg

I was pretty drunk by the time I got on my plane.

Fun fact: 2 of my examiners were on my flight.

Fun fact #2: They did not acknowledge me or choose to sit with me despite it being an open seating policy on Southwest.

#awkwardturtle

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The following couple days were excruciating.

Could barely sleep.

Today, I logged on as directed to try to get my scores.

I saw this.

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Then over the next excruciating hour, this.

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But finally this.

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I’m on my way to a fancy dinner with champagne and oysters.

Toodles.

A Rite of Passage

Oral boards. To most, this conjures up images from Grey’s Anatomy.

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There is a grain of truth. The process sucks. You wear suits. But there are no chairs in the hallway. And you don’t sound nearly that intelligent. Really, you’re trembling like a moron and bumbling like an idiot.

I took my oral boards yesterday and today feel completely exhausted, like I ran a marathon. Though those that know me know that I would never actually run even a mile.

In the months preceding, most of my free time was spent studying.

The few days before, I flew into glorious louisville Kentucky.

This is my story.

I write it not really for me, but my lovely co-residents still in training. This is what you have to look forward to.

Full disclaimer: I do not know if I’ve passed yet.

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Sitting at the gate, flying to Louisville, I was thinking “WTF. Can’t believe I’m doing this. “

I had this look on my face most of the time.

Caution: the following image is not intended for all age groups and persons.

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Feeling like crap, I decided to have a drink while on my layover. I chugged a glass of red wine.

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I barely made my flight, landed in KY, and made my way to my home for the next few days.

I woke up the next morning and started studying in my special study corner. So pathetic.

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That night, I walked to the only nearby food source for a spectacularly shitty dinner.

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I woke up the next morning and started studying again.

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No pride in personal appearance remained.

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In the late afternoon, I stopped studying and decided to treat myself to a fancy dinner. My extended stay shuttle took me to and fro.

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I chilled out watching my fave- The Bachelorette.

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I slept about 5 hours which is actually amazing. A lot of my friends slept not a wink. I did wake up with a nightmare, but it did not involve a bone marrow ordering cat.

I woke up at 545 and put my happy face on.

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And got ready to face

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Come back tomorrow to see how this shit show ends.

Feline nightmares

I think the stress of my upcoming exam is getting to me.

A few nights ago, I had a dream that I was watching a cat for a friend.  I was kind enough to let it sleep with me in the bed.  But it kept on trying to bite me!!

 
So I threw him in the closet and locked him in there so I could sleep. 
 
But this was no ordinary cat.  it was like the smart dog on Family Guy.  very human and smart, and he could talk.
 
He actually called and ordered a bone marrow biopsy on himself.  
 
So a lady came over and unlocked the closet and took him out.
 
We locked eyes, and he rans toward me, with the intent of biting me on the neck!
 
I woke up  with my right shoulder shrugged towards my neck trying to protect myself from the bite of this cat.
 
Holy shit! These are the kinds of nightmares I’m having now.  
 
When I told J, he kept on saying, “Hello, I’m a little kitty and would like to order a bone marrow biopsy”, in a cat voice.
 
FML